While Valentine’s Day is truly a commercialized Hallmark holiday, for many, it’s a day that can dredge up many issues. Those in relationships feel the pressure of having a fairy tale like, out of this world, romantic day, leaving a lot of people terribly disappointed. Singles, on the other hand, either look upon the canoodling couples with yearning or even disdain, feeling lonely and sad. Even though we all know that this holiday is pretty much made up and silly, it hits home for a lot of people and has become a day that most people have come to dislike, regardless of relationship status.
However, there is something that can be learned from this chocolate and rose filled spend-fest. If there is one thing we can take away form it is that we should learn to love ourselves. After all, we are going to be with ourselves until the day we take our last breath so why not make it pleasant? And when we learn to truly love ourselves, we then can attract healthy and fullfilling relationships with others, be they romantic or platonic.
In this day and age it has become difficult to take time to focus on “the good” we have within us but is imperative that we do. Yes, our society pushes us to be better, richer, have more stuff, be successful, etc but none of that matters without a strong and healthy sense of self worth. And once you learn to love yourself, regardless of what you have or don’t, where you happen to be in life or aren’t, much of the angst melts away and real healthy happiness sets in. And who doesn’t want to be around a happy person?
Well, now the question is, how do we learn to love ourselves? Sure, it’s not going to happen overnight, as with anything that is worth anything, it takes time and practice but the benefits are boundless! Here are a few things you can do so that you can come to love and treat yourself with a full and happy heart!
- Fall in love with YOU – Think about what makes you You. Just like a flower that needs watering to grow, learn to nurture yourself in every way. Love yourself for all the good that you see and accept your flaws and the fact that you are imperfect. This does not mean that you do not learn to change from your shortcomings; instead, you are being gentle and kind to yourself despite all your “flaws”. Look in the mirror and fall in love with the reflection that is You.
- Don’t be so hard on yourself – Do you often berate yourself over the tiniest thing? Is there a little voice inside your head that often tells you that you are no good because you are stupid or make mistakes. If you find that you criticize yourself often, make an effort to stop the self criticism.
- Be Kind And Positive – When you start to think kindly and positively about yourself, the love you have for yourself just grows. Make it a habit to praise yourself everyday, while in the front of the mirror. Because of such thoughts, you naturally undertake empowering actions that support your development.
- Acknowledge Your Effort – It’s not always about winning or having success in everything that you do. Many times, it is the effort that counts! Acknowledge that you’ve done your best, even if you have failed to produce tangible results.
- Let Go Of Worry – Loving yourself requires you to let go of your worry. It is a horrible way to live a life filled with constant worrying. Worry does not help in any way. It cannot, on its own, make things happen. Only wise actions can! So instead of worrying, spend time thinking about what you can do to help in the situation. This is especially true with situations that are beyond are control. Learn to let go!
- Trust Yourself – Have confidence in your abilities. Know that you have the ability to make important changes for yourself, for as long as you put your heart to it.
- Forgive Yourself – If you have made mistakes in the past that had caused you to feel less worthy, then you need to forgive yourself. All of us make mistakes; so there really is no need to beat yourself up over them. Or if you’ve been carrying around a baggage of emotional hurt, learn to let it go as you can’t change the past but you hold the keys to your future.
- Be Truthful To Yourself – Loving yourself requires you to be truthful about your own feelings. If you are happy, acknowledge the joy. If you are sad, acknowledge the sorrow. When you are truthful about your feelings, you do not try to lie to yourself or seek to bury your negative emotions. Instead, acknowledging what you feel provides a good guide to what your thoughts are. And as we all know,
- Express Gratitude – Express gratitude for the person that you are. For instance, cultivate an appreciation for your strengths and gifts. Also, feel a sense of gratitude that you are alive and well, and fully capable of making a difference in your life.
- Nurture Your Dreams – Why deny yourself your dreams? When you nurture your dreams, you would love the life that you are leading. Every moment that you live is a joy because you are expressing yourself fully.
- Boost Your Self Confidence – Make a deliberate attempt to look for opportunities that can help improve your sense of Self. For instance, if you are particularly good at doing something, set aside more time to indulge and improve your skills on it. Knowing that you have particular gifts can boost your self esteem.
- Relax – You need to give yourself space to take breaks every now and then. If you spend your time working, without paying attention to your health, it also means that you do not love yourself well enough to take care of your own body. Fill your time with anything that nourishes your soul.
- Have Fun – Inject some fun into your life. Life is meant to be an enjoyable. Don’t take life or yourself too seriously. If you can think of life in this manner, you automatically relax and quit worrying over things that do not matter.
- Look After Your Body – One of the most important things you can do is take care of your health. It is important that you strengthen yourself with proper nutrition and regular exercise. Your body is the only one you will have in this lifetime and you should treat it with respect, love and care. And if you do, it will take care of you. It has been found that the lack of self love is often the root causes of conditions like eating disorders, obesity or even terminal diseases. Your body is top of the line and state of the art so treat it as such.
- Learn To See Beauty – When you learn to see beauty in every thing, you will also see beauty in yourself. Hence, stop to smell the flowers. Notice everything. Feel everything. The pink blush of the flowers in your garden, the greenness of the plains, the whisper of the gentle wind, or the myriad hues of an evening sky.
May YOU have a very Happy Valentine’s Day!